WTFH

Hey, Fandom. It’s Jack. I would apologize for missing the last couple weeks, but that Karla chick did a pretty decent job.

Anyhow, island’s dead. Up in the dorms, all that’s going on is that Flick worked out in the gym. In town, people were calling Tamsin about chocolate coins at the Trooper Station instead of just eating them. Eponine delivered mail in the chocolate rain, Hanna probably made a sweet dress out of them at Demon Marcus, and Boring Jack turned coins into a mosaic at Devil’s Nest.

And that was it, and I am out. Merry Christmas if that’s your thing. Either way, don’t let the reindeer run you over.

[OOC: Many thanks to the fantabulous glacial_queen for filling in while I was on sick leave.]

It's Jack, it's Tuesday, today's date is eleven-twelve-thirteen and that's almost interesting, and the squirrels are wearing tiny little scarves because it's fucking snowing. Hi.

So yesterday at school, Anger Management paired up to talk using stress balls. What's that, a ball you throw at the other person? 'Cause that would ... oh, okay. Squirrels are gesturing that you squeeze it. Way less fun. Kitty showed Modern American History a movie about the '60s, and I took Teamwork to the Vietnam memorial for Veterans Day. Care for Magical Creatures fed bligesnipes, and the first person to tell me what those are gets a prize. Probably a squirrel scarf. Annnnnd Science You Cannot Possibly Comprehend talked force fields, complete with building their own, and that is a project I can get behind.

Also at school, Riley cursed at his computer, because 21st-century technology sucks, and Josh visited to commiserate and talk about his love life.

in the dorms, Flick woke up screaming, which is always fun, and Alec came up to check on him. Because Alec's a friendly guy that way.

In town, Luke's had a special on tacos because Gert's kind of drowning in 'em. Hanna explored the possibility of fashion classes at Demon Marcus, and you were out of luck if you wanted dairy at Turtle & Canary, 'cause Mike Ehrmantraut shut the fridge down.

Kenzi watched Dancing with the Stars on her phone at Caritas, while Jack Priest tried to come up with a Thanksukkah -- Hansgiving? -- cocktail at Devil's Nest.

And that's the news for today. Later, Fandom.

I'm Jack, it's Tuesday, the squirrels are in Halloween costumes. Let's do this.

School's pretty quiet today. Anger Management talks music, Modern American History covers McCarthyism, Teamwork plays kickball, and Science blah blah blah builds jetpacks. Gimme one. Thor's now in charge of Care for Magical Creatures, and his first class is about Halloween animals.

Up in his office, Riley did some editing.

And over at the dorms, Flick gets an email that seems to piss him off. Hope you hurt whoever it was. And later on, Scott watches TV and has pizza all by himself.

In town, a whole buttload of people are hanging out at my teaching buddy Derek's house hacking up pumpkins. Stiles whines to Derek about there being too many pumpkins and how Jackson sucks, while Jackson gets to carve pumpkins to learn control. Fun. Stiles and Jackson also express their mutual joy at running into each other.

Then Kitty stops by to deliver coffee and talk to Derek about his plans for the pumpkins. Jackson grumbles a little but ends up taking one of the pumpkin -- of fucking course -- coffees and introducing himself to Kitty. He tells her he's gonna be lame and skip the Halloween party. Stiles turns down coffee because he already has a peppermint mocha, which Kitty thinks is seasonally inappropriate. Whatever, mocha's awesome.

Not-cool Jack wants to know if the pumpkins are invading. Is that a thing? Derek explains about the party and they end up talking about what diva Jack should be for Halloween. Stiles and Jack toalk about being happy their houses aren't full of pumpkins and then the squirrel got bored and wandered off. And Kitty gives him a coffee, NOT to throw at evil pumpkins -- seriously overding the joke there, Jackie -- and then they talk Halloween costumes.

Pinkie Pie visits to check with Derek on the party preparations, and Kitty explains the whole Jack o'lantern thing to her. Also, she and other Jack are maybe having a pumpkin tea. Because they're 90.

Dr. Girlfriend had a diamond shipment over at Curiosities, Oddities and Antiques. Flick wants to sell stuff to the store, and Kenzi drops off a jewelry box. Hanna is bucking the trend by not putting Halloween costumes on themannequins at Demon Marcus. But don't worry, it's still Halloween for Kenzi and Mira at Caritas and Jack Priest at Devil's Nest.

And that's the news. I am outta here for another week.

How the hell do the squirrels gota whole radio set-up into my hotel room? Seriously, someone should get on that.

Anyhow, it's Tuesday, I'm Jack, lemme read this so I can get back to important vacationing.

Back on the island, Priestly was writing emails when Dinah visited to sob all over him about the war being over. Hanna wasplaying Candy Crush at Demon Marcus when she got a visit from Mike Ermantraut, who bought a shitload of clothes. He then goes to Caritas, where Kenzi is building a booze pyramid. Mike disapproves but gets booze for himself. Oh, and Dinah has a nightmare at Priestly's, and he's good with her so she kisses him. The squirrels are dancing and have a sign that says 'Finally!'.

So that's the people who aren't on the trip. Here at the Castello di Casole, it's just a little rainy. Nothing nex to the place where I grew up, trust me. People hadbreakfast at Ristorante Tosca. People like Bay and Jim, who decide too much food is fine on vacation and talk abotu the shit they're supposed to get for people back home. Riley has lunch at Pazzia, and Theo and Cordelia hang out at the spaaaaaa.

Topher and Kitty take cooking classes, but damn near everybody took off to see the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Maddie catches Cade photobombing tourists and talks him into taking her photo too, and then she and Bay talk about how they should get into town more. Alec, Liara and Alex hang out at the cathedral. Anakin yells NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO at the Battistero and somehow that feels very right. Flick and I hang out at the cemetary, and, in town, Cade's trying to hit on Italian college students but tells Korra he's not having much luck. Jess Day goes shopping for souvenirs, like pope on a rope. I have no idea what that is, but it's fun to say. And Atton multitasked by eating pizza and hitting on college students. Impressive.

In the evening, there was still a hell of a lot going on. Not that Theo saw it from where he was hanging out in his room with room service and movies. A whole bunch of people went to Canadian Thanksgiving at Ristorante Tosca, where Riley and Kitty catch up and she shows him how to drink wine. Kitty also talks to Clint about all the food and her cooking class.

Over in the bar, Billy is dubious about Topher's lavendar drink. Wise choice, Billy. Nothing good comes of drinks with umbrellas. Flick goes swimming in the pool, and Jim has a lot of food and a lot of wine. Gert is reading in the bar, which Cade teases her about, and Cecil just explores the city.

And that's what I have. I'm going to go for a run now. Bye, Fandom.

Hey. It's Jack, the broadcast booth is way too freaking hot, and the squirrels are drunk and butt-ass naked. And also there's pollen, so maybe get some medi-gel for that if your allergies are bugging you.

( And now the news.  )

That's it for today, Fandom. Kisses.

Hey. It's Tuesday, I'm Jack, have some radio.

See, squirrels? You didn't even have to drag me here this time. But I still want the freaking rum.

Over at school, students in Bruce's Anger Management class get to go to a Danger Shop onsen. Which, according to my dictionary, is a fancy word for spa, so nice class, Bruce. Modern World History learns about World War I on a quiet battlefield and talk about the time the soldiers played soccer on Christmas Day. Guess war was nicer back then. And in Teamwork, my kids worked together to build a model spaceship out of Legos. Gert talks Isaac into working with her 'cause she thinks it's easier, while Cade and Surreal decide to boss everybody else around. Nice management, guys.

In Science You Cannot Possibly Comprehend, Doom tells Victor and Cecil they suck as students and then talks about interdimensional travel. They go to Doom's lab where he explains they have to repair the Bridge travel device to get home. So some of them get ready to fix the damn portal, including a flying Karolina. Meanwhile, special snowflakes like Topher, Cecil and Victor try to build their own.

They get back, bee tee dub, and Doom warns 'em not to whine.

Also at the school, Riley's on the phone in his office moaning about somebody named Abigail.

And up in the dorms, Topher is stinking up the third floor men's room with humming and strawberry shampoo. Mordin lurks outside, which is creepy, but not as creepy as the fact the squirrels take notes on this crap to start with. Theo is playing with his computer and listening to music in his dorm room, thrilling, and Jessica has cookies in the lobby as part of her Student Council campaign. Jim stops by to hassle Jessica about running . And to eat cookies, I bet.

Up in Town, Scott has a baby bunny at Furnado. Hs double Victor visits and is all "oh, hey Scott" and Scott is all AAAAAH, because I guess he wasn't expecting to meet his clone today. But they're cool by the end of the conversation, so yay.

Vider asks Scott about snakes 'cause she's a freaky chick like that, and a fluffy white dog makes its own way into the shop.

Stiles has a latte and a pastry at the Perk, where Jim visits to ask whether he's gotten any new tattoos lately.

Also, in town: People did their jobs. Cade had pizza and Legos at Stark, Hanna had fashion magazines at Demon Marcus, and Kenzi had ladies night at Caritas.

And I have no more notes, so I'm outta here. Talk at you next week, Fandom.

*sound of chittering and shuffling*

These are some damn pushy squirrels. Guys, I tell you, you let me near an open mic and the station will lose its license so fu– oh hey, the light is on and the furry freaks are waving paper at me.

There’s rum if I do this? All right, all right.

*throat-clearing*

I'm Jack. This is the news. ( Newsy news news! )