WTFH

Oh, hello. I haven't seen you in...

*chitters*

What? Where's the squirrely fellow?

*more chittering*

Hm. Well, you should tell him to come by here, if he doesn't want to go to the Clinic. Honestly, does he think I bite? If you'll hand me the notes...thank you.

Good morning, Fandom, this is Dr. Hannibal Lecter with the news from yesterday. Nothing at the school or dorms, with apologies to the delightful porg.

*sad trilling*

In town, there was a brunch for everyone's visitors, where Cutter, Becker, Lester, and Connor - I believe that last one is "or", not "er" - caught up and fought glitter. I recommend a good dry cleaner. Bellamy and Grimm flirted, and Arden, Grimm, and Duke discussed their current and potential conquests. Kurt and Logan talked about their home, and a number of other people also attended.

I hope you all had a lovely weekend and enjoyed shocking your visitors.

Later in the afternoon, Layla and Watts spent some time on the beach, largely discussing Marc and Steven.

And in the evening, Raiden got a visit from Lazarus, who spoke about a guest they had that time the dead visited, and Tony Stark was in his lab, "doing science". For once, our furry friends seem to have taken discretion over curiosity.

That seems to be all, unless you had something else?

*hopeful chittering*

*sigh* Yes, all right, I have the good rum. I do realize that's the reason you make these field trips. Come along.

Yes, all right, I'm coming. I haven't had to do this in some time. What happened to the usual person?

*chittering, paper rustling*

Ah. Apparently Jon was feeling ill at home, and got visits from Billy and Lucille.

I hope he's feeling better today. And...that appears to be all of the notes. So you brought me here simply to inform everybody why I'm here?

*chittering*

*sigh* Very well. I'm going back to my breakfast now.

*chittering*

No, I wasn't planning on having rum with it. Convince me and I'll bring it out.

Have a good week, everybody.

Ah, good morning. Where are the rest of your friends?

*chittering*

Well, if you drew the short straw, perhaps I'll give you the good rum today.

*excited chittering*

Perhaps.

And good morning to the rest of you out there. We have only two notes this morning, as school and the dorms were both silent. I imagine everybody is getting ready for whatever graduation may bring.

At Groovy Tunes, Kaylin was refusing to take any payment but cash. Ah, Jono should perhaps go over how to use credit cards. I'll let him know.

And at Covent Garden, they got a shipment of paper flowers, and Octavia amused herself by pulling one apart.

And that would appear to be everything, so now I have a solitary furry reprobate to appease. May this weekend be interesting, at least.

Good morning, Fandom. I'm going to get this done quickly, because the island seems to have begun a new oddity. Speaking of which, where is Leroy?

*chittering*

Jumped by a - I'm not certain I want to know. Never mind.

So, yesterday to begin with the usual things, Friendship and Stabbing had a dungeon for a final exam, with a survey, puppies, and horridly chemical-laden juice at the end. Urban Survival had a class about squatting and then a final assignment to determine where best to live on the island without a formal home. And Art was apparently cancelled.

In town, Kitty was at the Perk after apparently shopping on the mainland, Sidon was at Furnado dealing with a firey guest, and Jono was at Groovy Tunes, where Kaylin stopped by to ask for - and receive - a job, and I dropped off food for Alluka and sun protection for Jono, before Alluka herself came by so they could leave for their trip to Disneyland for the weekend.

Given what went on later, perhaps I should have joined them.

Quark was mixing drinks at his casino and apparently ripped a hole in the multiverse and let loose some odd skinless canines. One attacked Kanan and was driven off by his dog Stance and my TA Summer; one attacked Amaya and was driven off by Rosa; one got Liam and was dealt with by Eric, and yet another got to Kathy and was driven off by Raven. All of the rescuers somehow managed to get their rescuees to the Clinic, where Jenkins helped Rosa and Eric (who seems to have developed some sort of magical power), before I arrived to take a look at things. There seems to be nothing physically wrong with them apart from scratches and bruising, so we are at this point looking at a magical effect those creatures may have had. Meanwhile, Raven called Anders and Dante to help look after Kathy, and Summer called Hera about Kanan.

So far that would seem to be the news. So, should you see one of these creatures, you might want to avoid it. Perhaps staying home would be the best.

Good morning. Apparently the squirrels are also feeling energetic this week, as there are quite a few notes for me, so let me get to them before my class.

In school, Friendship and Stabbing fought in a suggestive-looking cavern, Urban Survival made the wise decision to leave the island and go to a women's shelter to help care for the children, and Art was cancelled because today was to have been life drawing. Probably also a wise decision.

Over at the dorms, Breq was selling tickets to Prom, and later Uma was braiding her hair in the fourth floor common room when Sidon dropped by for fishsticks, Ringo dropped by to discuss sex, and Aloy asked about her hair.

In town, at Furnado, Sidon was dealing with animals affected by the pollen - you should see the flamingos in front of my house; at the Magic Box, Jenkins was trying to find an antidote to the pollen with a dog as the test subject; and at the Perk, Summer was watching a man have a fit at the baristas, when Peter walked in to play hero. Did you get the first man's name, by any chance?

At their home, Hardison let out the dog and brought sandwiches in to Eliot.

And at the beach, Uma went swimming, and later Rufus did some texting while playing frisbee with his dog, and Ringo complained he wasn't having enough fun.

So, that appears to be it, and I hope that those of you at Prom this evening will prove well-behaved. Those of you who are not, do try not to traumatize the person reporting on Saturday. Or if you do, at least make it interesting.

You took this long to find me?

*chittering*

Never mind; I am sorry I asked. You have the notes? Thank you.

In school yesterday, Stabbing and Friendship had puppies, Urban Survival discussed hygiene, and Art worked on paper art, such as origami and quilling.

And in town, Seivarden was at the gym, Kitty was at the Perk, and Sidon was at Furnado working hard so he could play with bunnies.

And in personal areas, Kathy was lazing about at home when Raven dropped by, and they talked about food, poison, and work, and Dante discussed the cooking show she was watching and sleeping apart, and Anders talked about wearing underwear.

Which thus concludes the things that nobody ever needed to know about. If that's completed, may I get back to dinner?

*chittering*

Thank you.


[OOC: Sorry! I spaced. Have a late radio.]

Ah, good morning. I suppose you have notes for me?

*chittering*

I will not apologize for not giving you another excuse to visit China. If you wish to go, you hardly need a reason.

Good morning to the rest of you that are still on the island; I have the news from yesterday for here and the school trip.

The students and chaperones flew to Guilin, where Sidon went swimming, and there were roast goose and nighttime excursions for everybody else, although Ringo and Alluka made their own fun with AirTrek. I'm pleased to hear she's enjoying this trip now.

And back here, Eliot was reading a book at home when he was interrupted by his partners with movie suggestions, and explained to them he has plans to bring Kanan to a bar fight. Well, I suppose we all have our own sorts of vacations.

And that, it would seem, is that. So, I hope that everybody here and abroad is enjoying their vacation. I am going to return to mine.

In school, Friendship and Stabbing got to shoot arrows at multiple Cupids. Unless you were Peebee, who simply strung them up by their heels so the others could shoot them. Urban Survival had to find potable water, and were gifted with pizza coupons in exchange, and Breq and Sparkle had a discussion about different ways to collect water. And Art discussed the newly unveiled portraits of the Obamas and turned the room into a darkroom to develop their photographs. Peridot's were mostly of geology. Also Eliot dropped by to discuss the pictures and who bought their kitchen gadgets.

Meanwhile, in town, at Covent Garden Flowers, Octavia was dealing with customers wanting post-holiday sales, Magnus dropped by to offer her a carved wooden flower, and Uma dropped by to see what a shop devoted to flowers looked like. At The Perk, Rosa drank coffee and indulged in a bit of people-watching, made a bet with Eliot about a rude customer's behavior, and debated the composition of tea with Seivarden. And at Furnado, somebody tried to adopt Sidon.

Ah, good morning again. You have notes for me? Thank you.

Yesterday at school, Friendship and Stabbing had to dance their way past skeletons and a minotaur, which apparently Uma excelled at, Urban Survival volunteered at a local food bank, and Art learned about Dindga McCannon and mixed-media art for Black History month, then created their own. Tony dropped by to talk to Hardison and got drafted into his own art.

(The pun was fully intended, naturally.)

Meanwhile in town, at Covent Garden Flowers, Octavia was working on an arrangement with a large, pink stuffed bear at the center, and at Furnado, Sidon was introducing himself to a large amount of new kittens, with varying degrees of success.

And that appears to be all, so I'll bid everybody a good week, and send these little furry busybodies off with a bit of rum so I can begin to make myself an excellent dinner while my husband and his tastebuds are away.

Good morning to you all. You have notes for me, I assume? Thank you.

Hello to those of you listening. This is Doctor Hannibal Lecter, and this is the news from yesterday.

At school, Urban Survival discussed the reasons people might become homeless, and ways to prevent them if possible. Breq mentioned conflict and prejudice, and Uma mentioned other reasons in her world for these things to happen.

Friendship and Stabbing had the students go through an obstacle course where they had to cooperate their way across a lava floor, up a wall, and through a fall on the other side.

There is no news from the dorms. Meanwhile, in town, Luke's had a piano, old-fashioned music, and Moroccan food, which I hope they did justice to, and Eliot dropped by to discuss museum blueprints as art. An interesting topic, particularly if the Louvre was involved.

At Furnado, Sidon was watching hedgehogs being entertaining.

At The Perk, Norman dropped by for coffee and to get warm, and ended up laughing at Seivarden because of a gremlin ghost, apparently. Which seems to make the squirrels uneasy.

And at the Trooper Station, Liam had to answer the phones and convince someone that nobody was smuggling rum to Canada using our tunnels, because one of his men was off tying healing crystals to bees.

And with that incredibly Fandom note, I shall leave now. I wish you all a good week.

Good morning, and welcome to the new year, everybody. I am Doctor Hannibal Lecter, and for those of you who are new, this is the news that the squirrels have reported on for yesterday.

In school, Cara and Magnus had their first Friendship and Stabbing class, and everybody was attacked by ninjas. I can see this will be an interesting shift to report upon. After that, Sparkle began his Urban Survival class, and the students discussed what they knew of cities, and then Hardison had his Art class, and the students got to create something artistic to express and introduce themselves with, which I am very happy to see.

In the dorms, Molly tried on new clothing and was happy that her dresses had pockets. A common sentiment, I understand.

And in town, Sidon was at Furnado letting puppies crawl all over him.

So, welcome again to those new and those returning, and I wish you all a good week.

Good morning to you all, and yes, I can give you some of this eggnog once we're finished here. You have the notes?

Thank you.

So, school is currently out of session and nothing happened there yesterday. In news of former students, Kathy brought a Christmas tree home and decorated for the holidays, and she bullied Dante into the holiday spirit.

Elsewhere, at the Magic Box, Jenkins was advising Santa on his vacation plans, and at Furnado, Sparkle dropped by to speak with Sidon and Zack about chickens.

Hardison was at Luke's painting the windows with Christmas scenes when Tony dropped by to apologize for his behavior this weekend and Mitsutada also stopped in to discuss the weekend.

That morning, Seivarden punched several snowmen on the way to the Perk, which there was certainly no call for, and then in turn was punched by Sparkle for taking advantage of him this past weekend, which it would seem is called for.

That reminds me, I have some phone calls to make.

*loud chittering protests*

Yes, after the eggnog!

Ah, so the hats aren't restricted to humanoids, then.

*chittering*

I believe you have sufficient rum at the moment to deal with them. More after I've read the notes; you know that.

Thank you.

So, yesterday everywhere was hearing the Carol of the Bells. Today at least is quieter.

At the school, my First Aid class discussed hypothermia and had to rescue Danger Shop constructs from it. I discussed with Peridot the importance of using whatever resources are to hand.The Island Hates You watched Die Hard as a thematically appropriate Christmas movie. Which it is, I suppose. And Hostile World discussed compasses and maps and had to use them to get to where they needed to be.

In town, Seivarden was at The Perk drinking tea.

All the birds at Furnado were chirping the aforementioned carol, and Sidon thought it sounded lovely but quickly got tired of it.

And at The Magic Box, Jenkins was dealing with every possible noise-making item performing its own version of the carol, and maintained that if they weren't singing it in the original Ukranian, it was rather a waste. I believe I agree with him.

And it would appear that those are the only notes from yesterday. I bid you all a good day and remind you please not to litter the place with any hats you remove. Thank you.

*drunken chittering warbling*

Good morning to anybody who may be out there. The squirrels are, I believe, attempting to sing Christmas carols. Meanwhile, I have leftovers to deliver to various shelters. The hazards of being the only one eating. First, however, I have news for you all.

There were no classes, as school was not in session, and the dorms were similarly quiet.

In town, Octavia made flower arrangements at Covent Garden, apparently unaware of the holiday, and Sidon made a Thanksgiving dinner for the animals at Furnado, which necessitated quite a bit of wrangling of them and cleaning up afterwards.

Eliot, Parker, and Hardison had Thanksgiving dinner at their home, and Dante, Kathy, Anders, and Raven came to visit for it. There was apparently a great deal of food, as is only proper.

At the other end of the spectrum, Mike was arguing on the phone about not giving Black Friday deals, and Brooke came to visit and brought ice cream.

And on the Fandom end of things, everything at Caritas tasted of turkey.

And now I shall leave you all to your own leftovers and any shopping you may be engaged in, and I shall get on with mine. I wish you all a happy beginning to your holiday season.

I was wondering when you would arrive. Very well, you have notes for me?

Good morning, this is Doctor Hannibal Lecter with the news the squirrels have given me for yesterday.

At the school, my First Aid for Fandom class discussed psychological trauma, which mostly involved the students staring at each other and refusing to discuss it.

The Island Hates You then watched a hair-pulling contest between programmed versions of teachers and learned a valuable lesson in questioning authority. Hopefully their own teachers, if nothing else.

And Hostile World discussed the importance of water and worked with solar stills to get their own.

Meanwhile, in town, Sidon was happy to have a job at Furnado and played with kittens.

Well, it appears that is all of the notes. So, either not much has been happening, or you have all been very good at bribing the squirrels. I wish you luck with that, and I will no doubt be back next week.

Ah, good morning. It seems it's time for yesterday's news again. You have the notes for me?

Hello, Fandom; this is Dr. Hannibal Lecter as usual, with the notes from the squirrels.

At the school yesterday, First Aid class discussed poisoning, and got to discuss the symptoms but watch videos of vomiting, because I like my shoes. Peridot seemed quite excited to see them. After that, The Island Hates You had a slumber party and the students seemed suspicious of it. Which is probably wise, although nothing untoward seemed to happen. And then Hostile World had to put on warm clothing and catch themselves food before dark. Breq managed to shoot a deer and make herself a shelter - well done, Breq.

In town, Amaya at the Turtle & Canary gave up on ledgers and posted a sign that the business is for sale, while Quark hung up signs all around town for his new business opening, which seems to be a mixture of casino and...hm. Whatever a holosuite is for.

And as we have a holiday coming up, Steve sent out Halloween party invitations and fielded a number of e-mail and text messages in return about the nature of it, with Kanan asking questions about the holiday and the Avengers, and Hardison asking questions about the food, which Eliot will be catering, and Kitty about the drinks, which apparently she will be. It also prompted Hera and Kanan to have a discussion about the nature of Halloween and whether it would be a good time to get our less human-appearing neighbors together for a trip to the mainland. That actually sounds like a very good opportunity, and I have a note here that they are taking advantage of it on Saturday, meeting at the causeway for a trip to the mall and then the Maryland Science Center's Halloween party, so anybody who might be interested in that, there is your opportunity.

That seems to be all the notes that I have, so I hope everybody enjoys their weekend and their Halloween, and no doubt I will return here next week.

Well, good morning. At least you had the good sense to wait until after I'd had coffee today.

*chittering*

Thank you. Now, where are the notes?

Hello, Fandom. This is Dr. Hannibal Lecter, and this is what the squirrels inform me happened yesterday.
My First Aid class learned about treating broken bones, which disturbed Summer a bit, and made Peridot squint at the individual I have been using as a demonstration. If you're wondering, don't worry; it's simply a type of dummy from my world. After learning about it, they got to try their hands on a simulation. Kaylin talked about what she had and hadn't done in the past, Khadgar wondered how likely these injuries were to happen on vacation, Summer did her best but said she'd rather call an ambulance, and Shiemi got a recalcitrant patient and asked for Summer's help.

After that, The Island Hates You fought zombies with gymnasium equipment. I am increasingly of the opinion that this class and mine should be taught in reverse order. Ahsoka felt victimized, Yang threw dodgeballs at the zombies, and Khadgar blasted them with magic.

The Hostile World class was cancelled with a note on the door and a bowl of change, and Shiemi stopped by and left an orange. Thank you, Shiemi; I'm certain someone will appreciate that.

There is no news from the dorms, but in town, Dani was at The Gig with coffee for herself and her horse, Sidon was swimming around the island, Peter at Covent Garden Flowers was dealing with a clingy plant and trying to figure out why he kept getting bizarre shipments, and at Caritas, Tino claimed he didn't know where anything was, so Cara made him inventory it.

That seems to be all the news, so now I will give these rodents their rum. I hope those of you who are coming on the ski trip do not in fact suffer broken bones.

*chittering*

No, you're quite right. I hope those of you not on the trip also do not suffer any broken bones.