WTFH

The intercom systems crackled to life this morning, possibly with a harsh bit of feedback as Deadpool fiddled with things needlessly.

"Whoa, that wasn't called for." He cleared his throat. "Never mind that now! Attention all wee students living in the cabins. Attention! Gee tea eff oh. Seriously. Pack up your crap and get back to the dorms while we investigate the mysterious stone that appeared over night and isn't suspicious at all."

A beat.

"Oh, wait, it is. Stay away from it, you little lemmings. Hear me?"

He was good at this. Really.

"That's it, folks. Get to work!"

There was some rustling around in the background, and then a second, less raspy voice.

"This is Mayor Summers," Cable said, "Noting that the camp grounds are now also off-limits to all citizens of the island, unless you've been cleared to come in. Please don't put yourselves at any unnecessary risk while we work out what this thing is. Thank you."

Click.