WTFH

Bridge: Hey everyone, Bridge Carson here, with my special guest co-host Rory Gilmore. Who is an actual other person, and not just me speaking in a weird voice.
Rory: Yes, seriously. What is with you schizophrenic people? Though I would be very impressed if you actually managed to imitate my voice effectively, Rufus.

Class-Like Stuff

Bridge: Impressions are not my strong suit, Barnaby. So I'll just stick with roping people into co-hosting with me. Anyway, in Music today we talked about music from Wizarding England, which is different from Non-Wizarding England somehow. Maybe the spelling, I don't know.
Rory: Oh, I've totally been there. Xander and I got something from a really gross shop. So maybe Wizarding England just smells bad. Anyway! In ACJ, we had a guest speaker...Consable Fraser. Hee.
Bridge: Okay, and here's where I have a question. Everyone seems to be, like, fascinated by people in uniform. I wear a uniform! Most of the time, even! So why does nobody notice?
Rory: ...I noticed.
Bridge: Yeah?
Rory: ...yes. Yes, it's a very nice uniform. MOVING ON. No Professor Pierson in History of Medieval England today. Woe. That is very sad. Very, very sad. Yes.
Bridge: Professor Cregg's out too. Huh. Weird. Professor Sidle, however, is present, and Chem blows stuff up. I wanna blow stuff up in my classes!
Rory: I'm sure you will, at some point. I'm very, very sure. Just saying. Anyway, Tactics of War kids get invites to meet their new professor at Cafe Fina. That's kind of cool. They used to do that at my old school, sometimes.

Bridge: Hey... you taught a class today? That's kind of cool. What'd you do?
Rory: I subbed in Political Campaigning, 'cause Angel can't, y'know? We learned about direct mail fundraising. Which is basically where people mail you money. Which is pretty cool.
Bridge: I should try that sometime. Okay, in the psych classes- 101 talks about designing exp- no, Experimental Design. And Jung works on their papers.
Rory: Oh, and my mom teaches about intellectual property and safety in the workplace. Yay mom! I totally figured out the name for the baby today. *pause* Sorry, that was kind of random. Anyway. Moving on.
Bridge: ...to Sex Cultures! Where they watch March of the Penguins. I don't think I've seen that one.
Rory: OMGPENGUINS. They're wee! And fluffy! And...wee and fluffy! PENGUINSOMG. *clears throat* Anyway. Classics learns about Latin grammar and Foreign Lit starts on a new story.
Bridge: Creature Languages is taught by... a raven. If it were in any other class I'd be disturbed, but since it is *creature* languages I suppose that makes sense.
Rory: Yeah...didn't Zero guest-teach as a kitty? So...not so surprising. And Arthurian Traditions turns in their papers. Yay them.
Bridge: And in Archaeology, they learn about pharaohs. As one does. I think that's it, for classes. Anything good happen in the Library today?

Rory: Well, I openinated, and you came by and we talked about stickbugs and meerkats and stuff.
Bridge: And then later, a whole bunch of dudes come by, two of whom then... disappear.
Rory: Into Special Collections. Not just into thin air. Don't fear the library, people.
Bridge: One of those dudes also talks to you about baby names and stuff. And then Cam comes in and talks about Jaye.

Rory: Hee. Hee, hee, hee. Um. Anyway. The only thing that happened in the cafeteria today was that Pippi ate alone. And in the teacher's lounge, Dr. Grissom had Mentos out, but no one wanted any. That's sad.
Bridge: Aw. Uh, Zordon says to watch out for the ghost fish and the anthropomorphic clay. Personally, I'd be more worried about robots making 'ping! ping!' noises. But that's just me.
Rory: There are robots that do that? Weird. Who says 'ping!', anyway? Stupid robots. Um, and in the clinic, it's all empty during the day and then Marty and Ivanova both see Dr. Pevensie.

Dorm-Like Stuff

Rory: So, stuff happened in the dorms. Like, Nadia told Veronica about how Dr. Seuss confuses her. I would say something about foxes and boxes and goats and boats but I am tired. Use your imaginations.
Bridge: And then Phoebe and Bel have a very long talk. About... whatever it is people talk about when they have long talks.
Rory: Possibly the habits of anteaters and sea creatures. But I wouldn't know. And then Kiki stops by to be all giggly with Phoebe.

Bridge: And Cal and Angel wake up all handcuffed together. Eventually they must have dehandcuffed themselves, because Cal came back during second period. And she couldn't have done that if she hadn't left first.
Rory: 'xactly. Lana comes by and Sean greets her like the excitable little puppy he is. And Molly gets candy from a thingy that someone put outside Angel's door. Nice idea, whoever thought of it.
Bridge: Well, apparently it was needed, 'cause Janet stops by for lunch, Logan stops by after lunch, and then Veronica stops by during the last period.

Rory: And then in places other than room 238, Janet studies, Alphonse and Walter play with a robot, and Cameron sends email.
Bridge: Paige meets up with Sawyer and they do... whatever it is that Paiges and Sawyers do, I guess. Cameron sends more email, this time to John, and John talks to Aeryn. And- well, I've already seen it, but what did *you* do today, Rory?

Rory: I cut my hair off! And then I went to the common room and Alanna, Cameron, and you all admired it. And wait a second - you just called me Rory.
Bridge: Am I only allowed to call you Barnaby now?
Rory: No, it's nice that you're keeping me on my toes, Bridge. Anyway, Jaye and I talked in the common room and she was all cute with Cameron. They're adorable.
Bridge: And then you told Peter to get a tattoo, for some reason.
Rory: He wanted a change. *yawn* Ah, sorry. Long day. Anyway, Professor Cregg is back and she has presents. Yayness!

Town-Like Stuff

Bridge: *yawns* ...know what I hate about yawns? They're contagious. So let's move on to what happened in town today. At Caritas, Bel learns that a certain contest has been postponed, and Weevil comes to hang out with Veronica. That's ni*yawn*ce of him.
Rory: Mm. And - *yawn* - and at Cafe Fina, Marty 'n Angela celebrate their anniversary. So cute. 'm just going to lean back a li'l in my chair, okay? And rest my eyes.
Bridge: No, wait, we still got radio, 'n Professor Calendar was flaily and Rory, Rory, wake up?
Rory: 'm 'wake. Professor MacGyver talkinated to Mr. Giles, yay, and...yeah. 'm 'wake, seriously. Yes.
Bridge: No, s'other Mac. Girl Mac. Hair's longer, s'how you can tell.
Rory: Mrphrigh'. Yes. Oh, 'n stuff with candy happened. 'm sleepy. Nigh', Rufusbridgeythingperson.
Bridge: Night Rorybarnabyranger... mppph, sailing.

*several minutes of snoring and the occassional mumble can be heard*

Rory: Uh huh. Mrph, thingy.
Bridge: mmmrph c'est la vmmmm.
Rory: Nuh uh, s'my potato. Can' have, nope. Mmm.
Bridge: Mmmmph, fivemoreminutesskydunwanna... *click*