Sam: Good evening, Fandom. You've all survived another Monday, congratulations.

Dean: And there was no overt weirdness to have to deal with, so it's all good.

Sam: It helps with this whole process when we're both human, I think.

Dean: And the proper gender. And age. And identity.

Sam: And in our right minds. You know, as much as ever.

Dean: All good things. We better get on with the notes before talking about it too much jinxes us.

Sam: ...yeah, that's probably a good idea.


School

Sam: Ethics and Etiquette talked about working as a team, which Zack and Hannibal seem to have picked up quickly, since they teamed up and asked Deadpool if they could leave class to get ice cream for everyone. Very smart and sneaky, guys. Everyone who was left discussed ways to work with people without wanting to kill them. I can say from experience that it helps if you're related to them.

Dean: Yeah. Knowing you'd have to explain to your Dad why you're down one little brother if you lock him in the closet because he'd discovered the Song That Doesn't End makes it easier to resist doing that kind of thing.

Sam: And knowing you'd have to explain to your dad why your brother has mysterious bruises makes beating him up easier to resist too.

Dean: Yeah, like you could beat me up.

Sam: Maybe not while I was entranced by the Song That Never Ends, but now is a different story.

Dean: You just keep thinking that, Sammy.

Sam: You know, I think I will. Art Appreciation and Protection ventured away from art and into expensive weapons today, in order to break into a palace and steal an ornate dagger. After class, Maron checked in with Ms. Devereaux, and talked about how they're both feeling better this week than they did last week.

Dean was in charge of Sexual Anthropology today, which meant it was a nice, relaxing movie day. You mean you didn't take the chance to tell everyone everything you know about sex?

Dean: It's not that kind of sex class. Though I did offer to answer any burning questions people might have.

Sam: Such restraint. I'm kind of proud of you. Destiny and Free Will talked about omnipotence, omnipresence, and omniscience, and how well they fit in or don't fit in with the idea of having free will. Tahiri, Ben, Valentine, and Leda all apologized to Lady Ghanima for missing class last week, Francine told Lady Ghanima that Merlin would be missing class this week due to being out of town.

Healthy Diet and Living focused on the "living" part by putting everyone through an exercise regiment of warming up, running laps, lifting weights, kickboxing, and doing crunches. Sounds like Dad's idea of a good training day.

How to Be Awesome talked about resumes, specifically video resumes. Priestly and Elena realized that watching Mr. Stinson's resume gave them a whole new perspective on him, while Harper was much more concerned with why Bobby had pudding in his hair, and they had plenty of time to talk about that while everyone worked on resumes of their own.

Over at the faculty offices, Constable Fraser talked to Ray about the other Fandom, and Ray talked about being promoted to Sheriff, and Loki was stuck doing work and using language that is totally inappropriate for squirrels. I know he swears, you don't have to make me read it too.

Dean: All well and good, but I don't think the squirrels need someone to police what they're saying. Next you'll be telling them they can't drink.

Sam: Relax, I'm not that crazy. Honestly.

Dean: Good, because I really don't fancy protecting you from pissed off sober squirrels.


Dorms

Dean: Over in the dorms, Jon reminded Claire that he exists by the simple expedient method of coming to her room to share cake and talk. Cake is always a good way of reinforcing your existence. And in other dessert food news, Bobby dumped pudding on his head, causing Kate to boggle at him before going back to sleep. Okay, if you're trying to eat the pudding you're doing it wrong. If you're trying to start a food fight, you're still doing it wrong.

Joan went to talk to Chuck about Rachel. Ah, another one of those talks for Chuck. That seems to be a regular occurrence for him.

Sam: He's actually being really good about this one, I swear.

Dean: Got tired of getting beat up, did he? I guess anyone can learn eventually. Jaina is a murderer. She killed John's pet fish. Not on purpose, so I guess that only makes it fish manslaughter. Tahiri mocked her fish killing skills. As you do.

Hurley checked on Ino, who was back from being away, to make sure that she'd only been gone a week her time, the same that it had been here. Which if this was anywhere other than Fandom would just be crazy talk.

There was much eating going on in common rooms this afternoon. Layla was eating muffins while working on a class project on the second floor, and Diana was eating peanut butter and banana bread sandwiches on the fifth floor. There was also a mini goat wandering around eating flower pots while a cat watched. Y'know, I think I've had days like that. Except maybe not with the peanut butter and banana bread sandwiches.

Sam: You're not very discriminatory in your eating habits when you're a wolf, I'll give you that.

Dean: I was thinking more about the time Alec was a goat and he tried to dance on top of my dresser actually. With a rose in his mouth.

Sam: I...think I could have lived without that mental image, actually.

Dean: I'll spare you the rest of the story, then. Anyway, Robin-who-is-a-frog wanted to now if Diana had a new pet. My bet actually would be on it being another student, actually.

And the eating theme continued into the evening as still up on the fifth floor, Jennifer was eating raw cookie dough and watching a John Hughes movie. Helen asked about the cookie dough and admitted that she'd never had ice cream. Seriously? Okay, wow, that's something that needs to be remedied like yesterday.

Sam: Dean Winchester, lover of desserts to the rescue?

Dean: Something like that. Dude, ice cream.

Sam: I know. Don't worry, she can still be fixed.


Town

Sam: The Mayor came home to find that Deadpool had rearranged their place to fit a kiddie pool in for Jan, which is strangely sweet now that I think about it. Also sweet was Ms. Davis getting a birthday call from her dad. Ender opened Stark Industries, and got his regularly scheduled visit from Ben. Shhh squirrels, stop waving flags. Irulan had tea at Imperial Brim, Mirax was rearranging the merchandise at Things Reborn, and Alex was trying to come up with names for her dog at the Magic Box.

Worf was less grumpy than usual when he opened Wellspring Arms, but for all I know, that could just mean he was down to like, an 8 on a 10-point grumpiness scale. Aphrodite had Decadent Delights open until she got a phone call about her son, and Miss Bennet was preoccupied at Book Haven. Lacey was trying to keep a bird from infiltrating Luke's Diner, while Liz made sure she was on time for her shift at the Arms Hotel. Vince was playing music for the animals at the Gig when he got a visit from Castiel, who was wondering what the Gig's purpose is.

Dean: I bet he was sufficiently angelly asking too.

Sam: Oh, you know he was. Veronica sent out an alumni e-mail from the Perk this afternoon, and was exchanging e-mails with Bel when Dani came in and congratulated her on her wedding over the weekend. Morgan gave Kenshin a job at the hardware store, and Castiel asked if Miss Vida Boheme, the new owner of the flower shop, was a man or a woman. Dude, it's called tact. We can teach it to you if we need to.

Dean: Also what things to look for while trying to ascertain if someone is a man or a woman.

Sam: Seriously. Peyton was out on the beach, burning artwork symbolically or something, until Griff tried to stop her. Good, I hope it worked. And Millie had a nice, quiet day at the clinic.

Dean: If there's one place I like to hear is quiet, that's it.

Sam: Yeah, especially considering the last few weeks. What else have you got from the squirrels?

Dean: Just a couple of almost empty tiny bottles of rum.

Sam: I guess we'd better leave them alone then. Say goodnight, Dean.

Dean: Goodnight, Dean.