Hey, y'all, it's Miley Ray comin' at you from WTFH, which keeps the news hopping around this island like a frog in an icebox. Here we go.

Over at the school, Basic Strategy had a discussion about Mr. Lannister's weekend, and then everyone had to write essays on what happened to them. Man, I am here to tell you, I would not want to be writing an essay like that. I'm just sayin'. Kenzi and Toby passed notes, which I am sure were about things that are totally free to be discussed and not secrets that people are keeping for each other, KENZI. And Kate the TA apologized to Mr. Lannister for not, like, watching out for him or something, which sounds way above and beyond for a TA and I think she's in the clear.

...Wait. Should I be doing that for Pinkie? She never said anything like that.

In Cultural Understanding, they talked about religion and tolerance and all that good stuff. I approve! And the students were free to talk about their own religions. Ooh, I wanna --

*frantic chittering*

Aw. Are you sure?

*chittering*

Fine, okay.

In my Creative Arts class, we were allowed to draw whatever we wanted. Fun! Butters talked about how the day before was his birthday, and -- wait --

Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday, dear Butters!
Happy birthday to you!

-- and talked to Annie about his weekend. Then Annie and Quinn talked about their weekends, and Tony was there but he was all embarrassed, and Mr. Rogers was around too.

Then in Aesthetics of -- wait, I can't say that word.

*chittering*

No, I mean it. So in Aesthetics of Word I Can't Say, people listened to the lecture, and then they were allowed to play chess or talk to Bobby, the little one who's my big brother's little brother and is probably not the teacher of that class.

And then in the library, William kept finding pieces of relationship advice. Keep your eyes peeled for the Ask Jennie column. She's the best.

The school office was open too, and Ms. -- hang on, it doesn't have a last name here?

*chitters*

And I'm really sorry if you're a teacher but all it says is Cindy had her office hours, which she spent laughing at the radio broadcast. I don't think that's very nice. I mean, the pirate is a little weird and all, but you shouldn't make fun of people.

So after school the notes are about the dorms. Wow, you guys were busy yesterday!

So Sam LaCroix -- ha, like lacrosse! -- woke up with -- OH. EM. GEE. Dude! That is so not allowed. Oh, wait, it says here they didn't. Okay, phew. So, right, he woke up with Natalie, and I guess she must've been just really tired and fallen asleep in his bed. And they talked about their weekends and then he got babbly and she left. Aww.

Cute Luke woke up UNDER the bed -- in some other room, not Sam's, that'd be weird. Oh, but there was a boy in there too! Percy. The grumpy guy, right? Luke totally hit him with a pillow -- see, boys have pillow fights too! -- and they got all freaked about their weekends and then the volcano outside.
 
...Yeah, seriously, what's up with that? Because I'm out of ideas.

Then this guy Warren, the guy with the Rock Band game, was in his room freaking out about -- sharing a bed, I guess is what it says here? Aw, Warren, don't worry, we all do it! This one time my BFF Lilly and I, like, totally had to share a bed because it was mega-cold in my house. So anyway, then Older Bobby came by and talked about waking up in a cave with a girl and losing his shir, and Warren mentioned killing people for coffee. That's super rude. Then they talked about stocks. Um, BORING! Oh, and then Karla stopped over to apologize to Warren, but it turns out Warren was going to apologize to her. Yikes. Maybe see a relationship counselor? And they mentioned how he was gonna poison her, and Karla -- well, I guess shared a bed with a couple other guys. I get why he'd be upset by that! If her room was cold, she so should've asked him to turn up the heat, you know?

Then this guy Topher woke up all naked and stuff -- hee! -- and his roommate Dave -- oh my god, Dave, I need to talk to you, like, stat -- confirmed the nakedness and Topher complained about -- I can't read that word. Not sure what that says! But Topher complained about it. And then Kenzi, my CLOSE PERSONAL AND INCREDIBLY GENEROUS FRIEND, stopped over to offer him band-aids in exchange for -- I can't read that either. Guys, you need to get better penmanship!

In his room, Bod was sulking in bed too, and he got a call from Kate with the brother who's a "chef" and told her all about his wacky weekend.

Squall was up checking his phone, but then Rinoa came up and yelled at him for sharing a bed with someone. YOU GUYS. SERIOUSLY. IT'S NOT HARD TO TURN UP THE THERMOSTAT!

Tara was in her room, texting. And so was I, in the bathroom, but you so don't need to know about that okay oh em gee moving on. Then up on the fifth floor, Dany was hanging out with those adorable little teacup dragons, and Rilla came over to talk to her roommate but ended up meeting Dany instead. Dany's roommate Petra was there too, and they talked about Something Important. And then Dany's neighbor Raven (not Baxter, by the way) came over and met Dany and the dragons.

Skeevy Nathan was mad up in his room and smoked, which is totally bad for you and way illegal. And Caroline showered and then I guess she was cold, since she got into bed with her boyfriend. And that is how you conserve heat around here, Fandom.

In the common rooms, Jack Carter was asleep in the lobby. Silly! Scully brought him coffee to apologize for something, and Jack blamed pollen.

Bart appeared on a couch in the second floor common room out of nowhere. Um, okay. In the salle, Kate from Georgia was doing some kind of self-defense I guess with a punching bag. Good for you, Kate from Georgia!

Alex played video games on the fifth floor, and Freddie came to join him. They talked about their weekends and how Freddie accidentally made Sam the girl mad. Ooh. I feel you, Freddie. 

On the third floor, Annie was pouring something down the sink -- I guess drain cleaner? But Kenzi didn't approve of wasting it, so she asked Annie to give it to her, and then they talked about student council elections. Dave who I totally need to talk to asked Kenzi if it's true she doesn't like wasting things, and Kenzi said yeah and she could probably sell it for a premium considering what happened the past few days. Why? Did people mess up all the drains this weekend? Annie and Dave talked about proper body disposal -- um, okay -- and Sam and Annie talked about why people drink. I wonder that same thing, but it seems a little random. Then Kenzi and Sam considered drinking -- not the drain cleaner I hope -- and then talked about regrets, and Dave and Sam talked about their weekends and how horrible they were.

Guys? You've got nothing on my weekend. Promise.

Now, town!

At MCA, Zayne was alive. I don't know who Zayne is, but I guess that's good, right? At the park, Ender and Quinn woke up together -- aww, did they have a picnic? Guys, that is ADORABLE -- and they talked about how they can't have any more picnics because Quinn has a boyfriend and Ender is --

Oh.

Uh.

Um.

Yeeeeaaaaahhhhh.

WellEnderlikesguysbutanywaythat'snotimportant!

Jack Priest and Kate woke up in a graveyard and were understandably unhappy. Kennedy brushed her teeth and went back to sleep up at the hotel, and Jono, also at the hotel, texted Tara and George and then had a visit from Raven about the ethics of sleeping with people. For warmth, I guess.

Older Bobby and Angelica woke up in a cave. Oooooh, awkward place for a picnic, you guys. And Angelica started crying because apparently they kissed and she's not so lucky with that, or something?

I hear that, sister.

At the church, Seifer woke up and ran back to the dorms, and Kenzi brought him something to drink but apparently it was awkward.

Ronan was all happy at the clinic though I can't imagine why, and Jack Priest stopped by to check on his sister. Only it turns out that Ronan IS his sister, so that was awkward, and then they -- surprise, surprise -- talked about their weekends.

At Stark Industries, Ender -- *awkward giggling* -- was playing with his laptop. Ben came by to make sure they were neither married nor dead -- seems a little obvious, but oookay -- and Peter came over to tell Ender to never mention this weekend again, and Ender agreed. Then Mr. Stark stopped by to check that Ender wasn't his new daughter-in-law.

...Wait, what?

Cafe Luke's was serving breakfast all day, and Angelica was hiding in the stables at The Gig. Ooh, how's BlueJeans? I owe him a visit.

Karla was throwing out some stuff at her shop that I guess belong to the church. I'd just return them there if I were you, Karla. Raven checked in to remind her that this weekend had been some other people, not them -- and can someone please say that to me, too? I'd feel a lot better, thanks. Kennedy came by and, in a shocking twist, did NOT discuss the weekend, but instead talked to Karla about cures for boredom. And then Someone Totally Not Me came by to return some things, and... you know what, we don't have to discuss it.

At Caritas, Jake was happy that the drinks were back. Kennedy was there and talked about how smoking is gross. Tell that to Skeevy Nathan.

On the rooftops, Robin was swinging around. Mr. Hercules asked her whether she was good or bad, and she seemed to say good. Um, good to know. And then Iron Man was there, and he talked to Mr. Hercules about how heroes always die and come back to life in his world, and then he snarked around with Robin a little.

Finally, at the Devil's Nest, Mr. Sparrow was happy because he found all the stuff to drink, so he made a sale. Jaina drank and they talked about weddings, Seifer had some coffee, and then Jaina stopped by the VIP room to say hey to Eric.


Okay, guys, that's it for me. I need a nap and some loco hot cocoa, stat. Till next time, this is Miley Ray Stewart, signing off. But before I go, enjoy this awesome song by Han--

*click*