Reno: Yo, Fandom! Another Tuesday, another drunken broadcast with... drunken... broadcaster types. I got an early start, yo. There was punch in the booze at the party tonight.

Jenny: There was a party? Why didn't anyone tell me?

Reno: You gotta check your e-mail more often, Jenny.

Jenny: I hate the twenty-first century.

Reno: Aww, there's a shame. The twenty-first century loooooves you, yo. We got notes! ... Daaamn, do we ever have notes. I ain't gonna complain about the notes, because I was at that party. It was a good party! Did I mention that?

Jenny: She actually doesn't like me very much, really. I can resent the notes all I like, however, because I missed the party. Woe is me. Luckily, I thrive on resentment and hate, so that's a plus.

Reno: So, really, this is a good night for you?

Jenny: Any night with liquor.

Reno: We got that too. Goes good with the notes. Notes!

School! No Liquor.

Reno: Ethics class got that obligatory baby assignment today. But with a twist. What's an Ewok? Better yet, what's a Jar Jar? The notes say that there was boggling, and that Jess got screwed 'cause he got the Jar Jar thing, but it don't look like the other people got it so bad, with whatever that Ewok thing is supposed to be. Am I even sayin' it right? Eeeee-Walk? Huh. Anyhow, Toby and Ender were around to play as TAs, and Dean hung around to have a talk to Anakin after class. Home Ec didn't have babies. Or Ewoks. Or Jar Jars. They had patterns, which they all worked on. As did Hoshi, who apologized to Lulu for... knowin' the future? ... Hey, Hoshi? Do you know who's gonna win the next races at the Gold Saucer? I could get some damn good Gil bettin' on the long shot, yo.

Jenny: I don't think Hoshi is from your world, Reno, although I could be wrong. Better to ask her about the next Kentucky Derby or Super Bowl, I would think. In Hunting 101, they talked about the undead. Like me. Not really. I'm just re-alive, ha. There was a lecture, then they talked about what they know about them. Generally, I believe they either drink blood or eat brains. Lion-o apologized for missing class, and Savannah told the teacher Johnny was a *censor beep*--excuse me, cat. Kitty. Lynx. Thing. Art class covered abstract expressionism, which means, as our teacher told us in her lecture, you make a giant mess and it's art. Which is exactly what we did. In Superhuman Physics, Professor Beaubier did his best to blind his students, who were then confused about what just happened. For shame, Professor.

Reno: Animinimone opened up the library today, which ain't new. What is new is that Alice stopped by to ask her to take her out to dinner. Heh. Romance ain't dead, I see. Music Speaks club did the percussive instruments thing, which I think means that they're reachin' out to one another by beatin' on crap, yo. Notes say the jammin' was hardcore, and Robin brought some tunes to show off to the group, because... I dunno. Frogs like to share, I guess.

Jenny: And in office hours news, Miss Bennet had hers.

Dorms! Crouching Dragon, Hidden Liquor

Jenny: In the fifth floor common room, Romeo had a birthday party. I apparently was invited. Happy birthday, Romeo! People arrived and mingled: Jeff was greeted by Romeo, while Ned decided to stop being a hermit and was greeted for his troubles by Dojima. Cal brought his girlfriend, who is currently a kitty, and Rikku and Dojima patted themselves on the back, while Ino bounced and talked to Cal. Turtle approved of the setup and spoke to Ino about some cookies, then she spoke to Hurley, who apparently made said cookies. Jack was also there, and impressed by the decorations.

Reno: I was there, too! Doji said hi to me an' made sure I brought ... important stuff. To punch the spike with. And Rikku tackled me from behind, 'cause she's Rikku, and-- *acorn thud* --And other people were doin' junk, too. Like Hurley, and Rikku, and Jen, who had a conversation with Doji about... candy omelets? Okay, I'll eat damn near anything, and that kinda sounds revoltin', yo. Sokka was there too, probably to mooch the food and fail to hold his booze. He got a loud greetin' from Doji, and a conversation the squirrel says is cryptic with my girlfriend. I gotta kick someone's behind, here? A guy's gotta make sure. Romeo did pretty good for himself, gettin' birthday greetings from Ned, Doji, Ino, Cal, Turtle, Hurley, Rikku, Sokka, and yours truly. Naturally, there were snacks, which Ned was hangin' out by. Me, I was just hangin' out by the punch because punch, as a general rule, has gotta get some kick, too.

Jenny: Sokka hung out around the food, which he told Turtle was delicious. Chad also hung out by the food. The punch somehow mysteriously got spiked by unknown forces, and Dojima drank some. Accidentally, I'm sure. Then there were party games, such as Pin the Tail on the Donkey, Whack-a-Pinata, and Spin the Bottle, among others. There was also dancing, and presents, and that was one busy common room, oi.

Reno: Naturally, in every dormitory, there are the spoilsports who don't crash the party. Like Blair, who wasn't thrilled about a radio report on some weddin' or other. Lee had himself one of them baby Ewok things. Wokling? A thing. From class. John was surprised to see one around here, but it apparently liked it when John sang to him. Aww. Warren decided that feedin' the baby-thing candy wasn't the best of ideas, and didn't recommend burnin' it. Knowin' Professor Skywalker, I got the feelin' that burnin' the class assignments probably ain't a smart idea, no.

Jenny: Oh, but it was such fun in the other class. I mean. That thing was clearly defective. *cough* Lee told Adah he was a father but she didn't have to kill him over the phone. Kaylee got ready to greet Ned all sexylike, but Dick showed up instead. Then Ned. This could either be awkward or a lot of fun. It's up to you crazy kids.

Town, Where the Liquor Flows Freely

Jenny: Roy got a call which had him leaving town quickly after notifying Aly, and Robin who is not a felt frog packed up, probably not to go with Roy, before Fraser came home to tell her he'd gotten beaten up on the mainland.

Reno: At Covent Garden, Ino was readin' poetry, to respect Remembrance Day. Veterans Day? Another one of them holidays that America and Canada can't agree on a name for, I guess. I stopped by, for no particular reason dammit, and I learned that they got flowers there. This is a big deal. I swear. At Book Haven, Hinata was runnin' on caffeine, while at the Photo Hut, Jack was tryin' to get rid of wildlife prints, cheap. Ish. Cheapish.

Jenny: At Cafe Fina, the utensils sang a lullaby, and at the Arms, Mary was nowhere in sight but pink balloons hovered over the desk. At the beach Romeo--quit smoking? Noooooooo.

*"Another One Bites the Dust" plays*

I am so ashamed of you right now, Montague. Really. Ghanima meditated at Serenity Cove this morning, and my charming cohost joined her for a lesson. Looking for some serenity, Reno?

Reno: I got to play with flying discs of death. It was kickass, yo. At MHA, Loki was chillin' by the poolside. Literally chillin', if it's an outdoor pool. Jeez, Autumn sucks. Sarah stopped by, and didn't know if the pool was heated. Loki, who was in the friggin' water also didn't know if it was heated. Sarah checked it out. Nope. Apparently it was cold, yo. Ronon wondered about the room service, and Loki told him to check with that person named Pepper. Still a weird-ass name. Adam was workin' at Android's Dungeon, and Turtle was coverin' the unicorn's shift for him today at T&C. Tully stopped in, lookin' for an early start on Thanksgiving shopping. Uh. What's a Thanksgiving?

Jenny: It's a holiday where Americans eat a lot of turkey.

Reno: The ugly bigger brothers of chickens?

Jenny: Indeed. Teyla was listening to soft music at Groovy Tunes, while keeping an eye out for squirrels. They got the notes in, Teyla, they were there. Pepper was at work on her laptop at Stark's, and Tony told her to make an appointment with the board. Sounds important. Aravis polished tack at the Gig, and Geoffrey is no longer a beaver.

*significant pause*

Jenny: No, it's too easy. There was rehearsal at the Boards. Robin studied his scene with Hoshi, and Tony was there managing the stage. Cal told Geoffrey Amber was a kitten. Animalism seems to be going around.

Reno: If what I been readin' on the internet is true, we can blame the furries, zoto. At Pixie Dust, Tink was hung over, and fixin' the problem with some hair-of-the-dog. At Wellspring Arms, Temari was busy in the meditation room, which apparently I gotta check out sometime. Murdock took his mutt out on the boardwalk. At the best bar ever, Marshall was wonderin' what was up with the... REO Speedwagon. I'll pretend I know what that is for the purposes of this show. What's up with that Speedwagon tonight, Fandom?! Minsc, his hamster, and a red panda all walked into a bar. Cue rimshot. Deadpool wanted the Speedwagon to stop, and lemmie tell you, it takes a lotta balls to not stop a Speedwagon (whatever the heck that is) when a guy like Deadpool wants it to go away. Arya stopped in, too, tellin' Marshall that she needs a job. And at the Clinic, Harley's sittin' around, infectin' the medical world with her cold. Nice.

Jenny: Maybe she's wearing a mask?

Reno: We can only hope, yo.

Jenny: Well, there's always heavy drinking. That kills germs.

Reno: ... True. And I been doin' a lot of that already today, come to think of it. What with the punch in the Everclear at the party and all.

Jenny: Don't you mean the Everclear in the punch? Oh God I'm still sober enough to realize that. *glug glug glug*

Reno: Nope. Punch in the Everclear, by the time I was done with it. We outta notes?

Jenny: We are! Hallelujah!

Reno: Sweet freakin' freedom! Say good night, Jenny!

Jenny: Good night, Jenny!

Reno: Good night, Fandom!