Hello, Fandom! Johnny Storm here, your self-appointed King of Dates. There's plenty of news to get to, but before that, a question to the girls I dated last night.

Hey girl... How you doing?

And now the news!

Pretty quiet over in the dorms, where Edward practiced his penmanship. Keep working those letters, Eddie. Good job!

And the library was quiet, along with apparently most of the town. I'm guessing that's because everyone was out and about at Caritas, where 3 Minute Dates was held. For the most part, let's just summarize those like: People dated, set up future dates, made out a little, expressed feelings, all kinds of stuff.

But before all that, a bunch of people got to the bar and drank some courage. Well, not just that. Pam drank because she's kind of a drunk, Cara got all glarey at Tino, and Atton glared at some whiskey. Face had a beer, Jayne had many, and Gwen got mad at the squirrel who signed her up and holy crap, Gwen, what's with you and those squirrels. Jono gave Hannibal a primer on what to expect, and Kira tried psyching herself up without any drinks.

Then dates happen, blah blah blah, I'll call all y'all, don't worry.

And then the aftermath... Dun dunn dunnnnnn. Nah, it was actually fine. Nathan went with water, Four had a beer, and Flick just hung out. Hatter and Hannibal - who I argue should be shipped as Hatterbal, just because that name is too good - compared their dates. Our host, who I'm really sorry I didn't get paired with, Jessica was mad at Tino for some reason. Both me and Travis just kind of hung around, but not together. I'll get you next time, bro. Drink's on me.

Speaking of drinks, Gwen found out Caritas serves minors. I can't believe I hadn't told her that yet. Gwen, I failed you, please forgive me. Irene and Hannibal don't have a clever namesmush so whatever. They talked. Rapunzel had a drink with an umbrella, and that's adorable. Sorry I didn't have a date with you last night. You have to let me know how yours went. That's actually what Jono and Hannibal did. With their own dates, not Rapunzel's. And Vic relaxed with a drink.

Atton and Jessica caught up and it was a little tense at times, not gonna lie. Flick got Mara the drink he promised her, and they talked about the band and gremlin bites. Atton and Sia had drinks and discussed keeping limbs and throwing drinks in people's faces. Which, just for the record, is something that hasn't happened to me here, which I think shows that I have this whole hot-heroic-playboy thing down.

Sia and Jessica caught up with what's being going on with each other since Jessica left, and that would be why I somehow haven't seen her around before. If you're going to be around, call me, you seem cool. Sparkle and Atton talked responsibility and pranks. And then Sparkle moved on to Hannibal to talk about how things went tonight.

So in short, we came, we drank, we dated. Good night for us, and a good day to all of you listening.