Deadpool: Hey! I’m back here. Again. God, I never escape this place, do I? No, no. Don’t answer that you adorable lil’ ball of gossip and rage.

*chitters*

Deadpool: You brought me cake? That’s so swee--wait, is this crap poisoned? I swear to god, if I get poisoned by one more rodent, I’mma just scream.

*Door slams*

Ghanima: This is highly unnecessary, you know. You needn’t brandish those little notebooks at me as if I’m a delinquent student. You could have just asked.

Deadpool: But, they have cake that might be poisoned!

Ghanima: ....Wade, wouldn’t you heal from poison anyway? We both would recover easily. We’ll simply eat the cake and read the notes, and then perhaps the little busy-bodies will let us go home.

Deadpool: ...yeah, you got me there.

School

Ghanima: Mr. Starsmore opened the library today, and he found that the helping hands were quite insistent on doing most of the work for him. He did help when Faramir of Gondor came in, needing to know what some items were, and Jono explained some contemporary Earth vocabulary and items. He also assisted when Raven stopped in, and they chatted a bit before Jono helped her find a book she might enjoy, eventually picking The Tiger, The Enchantress, And The Closet.

Deadpool: Man do I love Buddha Tiger!

Ghanima: We’ll see if you still feel that way after reading it seven-million times as a bedtime story.

Deadpool: Why you gotta hate so much? That’s my job, so step off.

Ghanima: Professor Sherlock came in to harass Jonothon again, after being told not to harass him by Mr. DeTamble. Right. Mr. Holmes, please do not poke the students. Luckily, John Watson phoned right about the time Jonothon started smoking and diffused the situation.

Deadpool: Yeah, you leave that to the professionals.

Ghanima: You do not count as a professional.

Deadpool: ...do too.

Ghanima: For this, you really, really don’t, dear one.

Dorms

Ghanima: In her room, Miss Scully is trying to figure out how the hands work in her dorm room, and offers it lotion...stop snickering, please, I doubt Miss Scully was doing anything like THAT. Miss Pryde is having some of the same issues, only her helping hand keeps turning her music down, and Miss Lane got one of the hands to pose for her painting.

Ghanima: Meanwhile, Miss Finkle has the hands help her create a dress form by wrapping her in duct tape. Very clever, Harper, and Mr. Wayne ‘finds hands doing dirty things’ in the boys’ restroom. The squirrels are snickering, so I’m going to guess that’s creative journalism at work.

Deadpool: Joolu--Juul--ah, screw it--Jewel freaked out and threw a brush at the hands because hands killed her parents. Or something. I might be making that up, but you'll never knooow. Faramir was takin' care of his horse when Gabrielle stopped by with more of those hands and some quills and they probably got their flirt on. Like what most of you kids do.

Deadpool: James of Krondor was playing catch in the second floor common room. With the hands. Well, that makes total sense. Oh, and Elphababababa was watching cable. Lots of cable. I hope it was HBO. They're gettin' edgy. Over at the Salle Percy and Luke had an epic battle to first blood. Epic epicness if the squirrels are correct. Up on the emo soaked roof, Effy was smoking and not sharing with the hands. Harsh, man. Harsh.

Ghanima: They don’t have any way to smoke, you know. Is there an even a legal age for smoking here, or is it much in the way of the bar? Don’t ask, don’t tell?

Deadpool: Pretty much, yeah. It’s that or frowning aaaaall day.

Town

Ghanima: At MCA, Miss Solo arrived home to find one of the hands arranging flowers for her. I’m glad they’re being useful, Jaina.

Deadpool: Aaaaand over at the clinic, things weren’t creepy at all with the hands helping turn pages as Ellie was reading. At Caritas John was apperently just letting Tino and the hands--I’m pretty sure that’s the name of a shitty Indie band--do all the work while he drank his pain away. And then Jaina stopped by and they talked and it was awk~ward.

Deadpool: Mitchell was busy lurking at the movie theater. Lurker. Blysse was attacked by hands wanting horsie rides at the Gig. I’m sure that’s not a euphemism for anything, but I can’t help but think it is. Momoko and Tim had, and I quote, daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate over at Cafe Fina where they got into the romantic talk of sentient dishes and helping hands.

Freaky.

Ghanima: I think that’s everything.

Deadpool: Damn was that a slow day.

Ghanima: I’m almost ashamed of the residents of our fair island.

Deadpool: Yeah, guys. For shame. I mean, sure it’s a holiday and crap, but still. Get on doin’ stuff so we can ramble about you and make wild allegations.

Ghanima: Or completely valid allegations that are equally entertaining. Good night, Fandom. We’re off to eat cake and borrow some of the station’s rum.

Deadpool: Good night, folks!